Colossians 3:8
“But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.
This topic right here is going to be one that I can totally relate to. I have dealt with anger for many years of my life and have been guilty of not dealing with it God’s way.”
For many years I did not control my tongue, my temper, and my anger.
And if I can be honest, transparent, and vulnerable it is still something I am working on, the Lord is still working with me in these areas. But compared to before I found Christ it has been so much better.
This is especially true when it comes to dealing with my anger towards my husband.
I have been with my husband for almost 18 years now and for many years the way we communicated with one another and treated one another was very toxic.
Before I found Christ my relationship with my husband was so toxic.
Now I can say since I have found Christ and have been in His Word and have been applying His Word to my everyday life I have learned how to deal with my anger and my relationship with my husband has done a 360. Honestly all the relationships in my life have improved. The way I interact with my children has improved, the way I interact with people at work, with people in general as I come and go through out each day, everything has changed.
We cannot allow outside circumstances and situations to control our actions and to trigger us. God’s word tells us that whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.
I have learned not to let others who have no regard or self-control when it comes to how they communicate and treat others to trigger me or cause me to get out of character. As soon as people show me who they are I believe them. I refuse to allow anyone to mistreat me, disrespect me, or talk to me any which way they please. And this does not mean I have to do them how they do me. I simply remove people from my life when they do not move accordingly. You see this new version of me has taken years to cultivate. This has been an inside job between me and the Lord. And not everyone takes the time to do the work for themselves. But that doesn’t mean that they have the right to come into my life and cause chaos.
I have been guilty of allowing people back into my life over and over again after they continue to do the same things over and over again. Because I thought forgiveness meant a free pass back into my life. But that’s not true. Yes, we forgive them, but we don’t necessarily continue to let people back into our lives. There must be a change in them, a change in their behavior because if they have not changed, you’re just allowing the same toxic cycle to take place in your life over and over.
And God’s word also tells us not to befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.
So, take heed my friend to what God warns us about.
A lot of times in the past I have noticed that I was so quick to anger. Slow to listen, & quick to speak. I would react and then things would be blown out of proportion and something so simple and petty turned into something so big.
When I tell you I do not let anything, or anyone rob me of my peace I do not. And I am so serious about this. I have let the Lord into my heart 3 years ago and I have been working with the Lord on myself. I am just worried about fixing me, fixing my heart, fixing my ways, and ensuring that I am living my life according to how God wants me to as best as I can.
The Word of God is a lamp onto my feet and it has changed my life.
People do not want to read God’s word because it is offensive. It goes against everything that the flesh loves, against everything that the world tells us to do and everything that the world tells us is good.
Jeremiah 6:10 says:
“To whom can I give warning?
Who will listen when I speak?
Their ears are closed,
and they cannot hear.
They scorn the Word of the Lord.
They don’t want to listen at all.”
The Gospel sounds like foolishness to those who are perishing.
Before my encounter with Jesus, I got involve with new age practices and I did not want to hear about the Bible, I claimed it was man made, I did not want to hear about it. It sounded like foolishness to me.
But my goodness am I grateful that our Lord is slow to anger, and He is patient with us.
The Word of God is His rod that protects you and His staff that guides you, and they comfort you.
When the Holy Spirit convicted me to read the Bible 3 years ago the book of Proverbs was one of the books that checked me and put me on the right path. It convicted me in so many areas in my life that needed work at that time. It is the book of wisdom. I go to Proverbs all the time when I need to be corrected to, Proverbs I go.
The reason we should deal with anger God’s way is because when we become angry it can cause us to do things that we will regret later.
Ephesians 4:26-31 says;
“In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need. Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.”
Wow those scriptures cover so much right there. Covers why we should control ourselves when we are angry, watching our mouths, working hard, tells us to get rid of bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander along with every form of malice.
We must learn how to be better ourselves, you see the work we do on ourselves becomes our gift to everyone else. You must learn how to answer people gently because that turns away wrath. If you’re harsh that will stir up anger. You cannot be hot-tempered because that stirs up conflict, but if you are patient, it calms a quarrel. You must rid yourself of anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.
The word of God says, “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?”
“You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God.”
You see you must do the work in you. Do not worry about what others are doing or not doing if you are doing the work on yourself, and you’re allowing the Word of God to change and transform that’s what counts. You are the light of the world.
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.
You need to be the bigger person and do not allow others to drag you down with them.
The Word of God says there’s a time to keep silence and a time to speak.
I know that every time that I decided to walk away, or end a conversation before it got too far, anytime I listened instead of speaking things went better. And every time I did not watch my mouth, and I talked to much, and I didn’t listen much, and I let it all out and said how I felt at that moment, I have always regretted it.
When I deal with my anger and with any situation God’s way it comes and leaves me with peace. And that is why it important to get in the word because you will learn God’s ways, and His ways are right. We can trust God because His ways are not ours.
You see God’s way gives us spiritual energy and strength to keep us moving when we are expected to stop. Our own way is temporary, but doing things God’s ways is permanent, it’s eternal.
I will end this with a scripture from the book of Psalm 18:30
As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.
Be patient, refrain from anger and turn from wrath. Do not be overtaken by evil, rather be amongst those who trust and hope in the LORD so that you will inherit the Kingdom of God.
Shalom!
